Go Ape for Christmas!

The myrealfairy Christmas countdown continues here with an adventure for all the family.

Your ticket to adventure – Why gift things when you can gift memories?

With vouchers from just £10  if you’re looking for a unique secret Santa present to impress employees or a thrill-seeker package for all the family, Go Ape has got it covered. Go on. They’ll love you for it.

go apeGo Ape are firm believers that outdoor experiences make people happy. Whether it’s zipping through the tree tops, whizzing along the forest floor, or bouncing on our super springy bounce nets – at Go Ape there’s an adventure for everyone.

go apeWith 33 locations to choose from in the UK, your loved ones are in for one memorable experience.

Go Ape

The locations are so impressive, our local Go Ape is deep in the forest. When we have been on walks in the local area we have all looked up in awe at the tree top obstacles swaying above us. Being able to gift this experience at christmas is great and I can’t wait to see the look on my boys faces.

Go Ape

 

If you are wondering where your nearest Go Ape location is you can quickly find the nearest or furthest (if you are really looking to maximise the adventure!) one for you is right here.

Have fun with your tribe and have one more Christmas pressie wrapped up and ready to knock the socks off your chosen one.

Let me know how it goes and also if you have been to Go Ape before, share your experience in the comments section.

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Is it just me?

Do you ever wonder if the bizarre, naughty or plain un-mummy things you think of are just you….I do!

Well here’s my confession….I don’t enjoy the responsibility all of the time.

 

1st disclaimer – if you’ve ever pursed your lips and tutted at someone who’s being un-mummyish then please don’t read on…. I need to have this vent.

I mean, I look at a lot of people and they seem to ‘cope’. Not only cope but even seem to enjoy being around their children all the time and doing mum stuff. One of the reasons I came off Facebook was because I couldn’t bear being mummy shamed by people looking relaxed and joyfully baking with their lovely little darlings, not just highdays and holidays, but regular as clockwork. Also making things and posting photos that show smiling clean children who look like they actually appreciate the perfectly turned out mum or dad next to them.

Here are a few of my sins:

I clock watch for when it’s time the kids have to go to bed. I also get a little excited as I look forward to it. My eyes flit from the bottle of wine, to the snack cupboard to my iPad, all gently purring my name in a frequency no one else in the house can hear.

I would rather not read a children’s story book all the way through at bedtime, I’m tired at 8 myself! The afore mentioned chorus of goodies downstairs is deafening to my ears by this point. I want my children to read well and I want to celebrate with them…just earlier in the evening please.

I’d like to spend more time and money on grown up stuff like make-up and clothes. Instead I blow it on boys toys, classes and kids ‘stuff’. I spend time on my things, I just need to balance it out a bit more.

I don’t particularly enjoy having their friends round, only because I find it stressful. Their friends are great – it’s me! What if they get hurt, fall out with each other or hear me swear under my breath as I stub my toe and then they repeat on a loop, steadily driving me into anxiety overload. Or worse, after having a successful couple of hours, burst into tears as soon as their parents arrive. It happens! I don’t know why, but it’s a kids phenomenon, they do it to torment adults.

Sometimes I just don’t get it – I don’t understand the rules of parenting, I forget that children are immature, yeah doh! I find myself standing in the middle of a room trying to reason with two boys who just want to tease, argue, play and do their own thing without mature interruption.

Finally, I’d like to be strong enough to actually follow through, just once, with whatever I’ve threatened to take away ‘by the time I count to three!’ Even my eldest at 10 started saying that I don’t ever do it, he’s 12 now and nothing has changed. So I’m inconsistent now and freak out at the small stuff.

2nd Disclaimer: Of course I love my kids! Of course I wouldn’t change a bloomin thing and of course my kids are my world. They fill me to bursting point with love and make me boil over with a loyalty to protect them.

But this parenting lark can be bloomin hard and sometimes I need to let off steam! Away from the kids, into my own little space. Sometimes it’s good to shout from the rooftops or into blogging world that it’s tough – without having to apologise or justify…..at least not too much;)

Do you ever feel the same or is it all plain sailing for you?

When I flip the other way I start worrying about the future and when they go out into the big wide world, I call it pre-empty nest syndrome. Hormones clearly play a big role in parenting for me and the huge job demands big feelings.

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Updated October 2018

 

I’m Getting Married!

I’m Getting Married! The time has come to make an honest women of me! But what will I wear, eat, say and do? The pressure is clearly on now.

Is that the right thing to say or should it be ‘we’ are getting married to be more inclusive? Whichever it is, the big day has been set and we are on the path to saying I Do. Beyond excited and having tummy backflips when I think that in 8 months the day will be mine all mine, oh and his too;)

I'm getting married

My OH finally took the plunge and asked me in May after years together and knowing that I was so excited about getting married and he had no idea or need to ever even consider that he would. Our German/English pairing never ceases to amaze me in the way we approach things, coupled with the men are from mars and women are from venus scenario, our lives are interesting.

Those of you who regularly drop by know that I talk about the boys and my OH but don’t delve too deep about our relationship. I do let out the odd gushy poem like this one on the plane from Munich which says it all in a moment of hormones and fear of flying panic.

How did it all begin…

Finding love in my forties after a fun-filled, crazy, sometimes sad and always challenging life came out of the blue. I was scheduled to pick up a visiting professional who had travelled down from London to where I am on the south coast  from the train station. I had known him for over a year through my work in social care by having the odd meeting and email.  I was stood by my car looking through the glass door of the train station, trying to peer over the heads of the crowd bustling through, when his face came into view and I was suddenly smitten…shocked at how this came out of nowhere…but smitten all the same. Once I had greeted him and got us seated and belted up I almost shook my head at myself as I had that silly smile that you get when you like someone but I tried to tuck it deep inside me and keep my super professional facade up as this was a work thing and I’m normally good at painting the picture of being in control onto a nervous face.

The drive should have been  10 minutes from the station to our meeting room, I took the scenic route to make the hop feel like a road trip.

On the way back he asked me for coffee in the station cafe, I paid. Romance my dear readers is not dead!

Skip forward 7 years and our combined families are now one happy bunch and planning a wedding.

Tomorrow is a day with my girlfriends trying on wedding dresses!!  I am pinching myself that I am actually going to be trying dresses on. In my mind I have low-key sophistication, but then I realised that I don’t even really know what that means!

This isn’t too much is it???

via GIPHY

The coming months are going to be crammed with planning. Planning for the wedding and planning for the loft conversion we are having done. Never do things by half should be our motto.

I’ve set up a Pinterest board today so please pin away with any wedding thoughts. If you’ve been somewhere and loved an idea please share it with me on the board. Drop your email or Pinterest link to me so I can add you.

The theme….Beach – Rustic – Chic, ridiculous but true! I can’t wait.

I’ll be writing about the lead up more and more over the next few months. Rings…will he wear one? Speeches…should be bother…. Being given away….is that even relevant these days? There’s alot to clog the brain with. I’ll need tea and help along the way.

I’m in the wedding bubble and it’s all about the ‘me’ at the moment!

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Best Friends Forever Notebook Giveaway

I’ve got a fantastic giveaway for you today with this Best Friends Forever Notebook.

With summer starting to fade its glorious sunlight into the dusk of autumn it is time to start thinking about Christmas. It’s hard to believe but it will be on us before we know it. This could be just the thing for school aged children to love and cherish.

This Best Friends Forever Notebook  sets down lasting memories of childhood friends.

With pages to write contact details, to have photos and to pop little messages that are recorded forever, it’s ideal to take to school during the last week of term.

My Best Friends Notebook Giveaway

My Best Friends Notebook Giveaway

My Best Friends Notebook Giveaway

So, all you have to do to win this notebook is to enter using the rafflecopter entry below. Good luck and forget to come back each day for a bonus entry tweet!

Here’s the Giveaway!

a Rafflecopter giveaway

 

Open to Worldwide Entrants.

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The Long Road to our Loft Conversion

The thought of building work and having the roof of our house taken off is a big step to take. But the space, oh the space and taste of luxury we could end up with! Could be a dream come true.

After our big project of having the conservatory built we have now started planning on moving upwards into the loft.  We’ve been thinking about it for quite a while and even cheekily went to see one of our neighbours who had had a loft conversion to see how they had ended up with their new space.

When we spoke to them we found out that it cost quite a lot of money, way above what I thought. For some reason I had in my head that it was only going to be about 20 or 30k but there was a big big difference. Building is so expensive now, it seems to be a bit over the top. Still I am  determined to try to go ahead and see if we can get it within our budget.

I don’t know about you but I tend to rush into things a bit too fast and sometimes that doesn’t always receive the best outcome.  Even though it’s a bit difficult for me to say that, my other half is far better at doing all the planning and really looking into things properly. I like to think that I have a good general overview but I must say, Pinterest is normally my best friend when I have any sort of ideas. I can go on that ‘pin’ button and hundreds of ideas  come forward immediately, it’s absolutely brilliant and helps me to visualise some of the tiny seeds of ideas that I have flitting around my head trying to take form.

The long road to our loft conversion
So many ideas! Pinterest has alot to answer for.

I left the sourcing and phoning around of people to my other half which he did and before I knew it we had three different builders lined up to come round to give us quotes. They were so different, the first one was a big company type where they have the architects, make the plans and deal with any sort of building regulations and planning applications. They would do the build all for one price and promise if anything goes wrong then they will plan in for any eventuality so you don’t have to worry about a thing. Of course, for this sort of peace of mind and hands off approach  you pay a really big price! Eek! This price came out of £55,000+ way ahead anything that we would even think to be able to afford.

The second person who came along was a builder who barely even looked at the loft space and just said well when you’ve got the plans get back to me I can make a price from there. That was really disappointing, that they didn’t seem to have any ideas or give us any guidance at all,  he just wanted to work from some plans.

The third one however in my Goldilocks story seem to be just right, they came in and straight away hit it off with my OH, he was personable, not to showy and came up with some really good ideas that we hadn’t t even thought of. The fact that they got on well was great since they would be the two people leading the project  suited me down to the ground. I really do want to take a back seat with this and not have to get involved too much with the building side or managing the builders. One of the other little extras that we liked was that he put in a call to one of his clients whom he had completed a loft conversion previously and arranged for us to go round and have a look.  To actually see first hand the quality of the craftsmanship was a bonus and my OH took him up on the offer.

the long road to our roof construction
Can you imagine if it rained during this part?

As yet we haven’t come to a firm decision and the price even from the 3rd one is way above what we first thought. We are now at the stage that we have to think;

Can we afford it?

What will it mean to us as a family to have this extra space?

Do we need all the added extras or should we scale down the plans?

Lots to think about but my gut feeling is to go ahead and keep working in the direction of getting it done. This one is a slow burner and needs time to develop.

Any tips or ideas would be so welcome, goodness knows there’s so much to come to grips with, we need all the help we can get.

Please get typing and let me know what you think:)

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A walk at Kingston Lacy National Trust

The Summer has been brilliant so far and it’s good to be out and about enjoying the fresh air. I love the area that I live as it’s 5 minutes to the sea and even less to our local river. A few months ago I had a really special trip when my dad and I visited Kingston Lacy in Dorset.

It’s around half an hour from us and armed with a snack and a drink, off we set. The road which leads down to the great house reminded me of visiting Longleat when we popped in during our center parcs stay with my OH and the kids. The long path with green fields either side, it’s a really spectacular lead up to the whole place.

I wanted to share some photos of the day which I think show off the colours of the plants brilliantly. This is not a collaboration post, purely a good day out with my dad.

A walk at Kingston Lacy National Trust
You can always find a shady spot

Where there are lawns they look immaculate, the grass looks and feels springy when you walk on it. Such a far cry from my lawn at home that’s been run ragged by the boys playing football every day.

A walk at Kingston Lacy National Trust
I wish I could make a postcard out of this picture, I love it

We were lucky that it was a gorgeous sunny day, one of those days that’s crisp and bright. We had an early start so there was pretty drops of dew all over the grass.

The Japanese gardens looked amazing at that time of year, lots of bronze and gold coloured leaves glinting in the sun.

A walk at Kingston Lacy National Trust

I packed a flask of coffee for our trip and there are plenty of benches dotted around so there is always somewhere to sit down and enjoy the views.

A walk at Kingston Lacy National Trust

There are also the expected hidden gems and surprises dotted around.

kingston lacy

A walk at Kingston Lacy National Trust

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A walk at Kingston Lacy National Trust
Looks like a regal seat

Have you been to Kingston Lacy? Maybe other National Trust places, I’d love you to share links of your posts below or experiences of some of their estates.

Here’s where it is:-

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Fortnite and the middle aged mum

Fortnite….have you heard of it? If you have kids between the ages of about 7 and 17 it’s pretty hard not to. But me a middle aged mum being thrown into this world and not wanting to be dragged out of it is a bit more unusual…I think. It’s almost like oil and water, they just don’t mix. I’m desperate to see if I’m the only mum out there who has got completely sucked in by this ridiculously addictive game.

This global phenomenon is Epic Games Fortnite; launched in July 2017 with Save the World which I know zip about, was soon followed by Battle Royal  in the September and it’s this mode that has flattered itself into my life.

It started with a seemingly innocent question from my youngest who is 9 asking me if he could download a game on his iPad. I have to put a password for any game he wishes to have and that’s the only reason he thinks to ask. So when I saw what it was and the picture had guns on it I took a breath to say no and both him and his brother equally sucked in their breath to let loose with pleads and begging which eventually turned into a full explanation of what the game was in a bid to get the gold coated password they wanted. I had a chat with my other half and he said there was no blood or guts to be seen and it was really popular. After putting up a bit of a fight I  gave in, pretty standard response from me.

Download complete but onto our PS4 or 3 or whatever the box in the corner is that goes in the telly rather than onto the iPads. The boys were over the moon, you would have thought that I was actually mum of the year. If this is all it takes then parenting is easy peasy. 12 years of thinking things through has normally gotten me pretty stressed and constantly at odds with myself about if I was making good decisions. This was a breeze, if only I liked Facebook I could go on there and put some ‘loving mummy time’ or ‘families together’ quotes and gushy pictures while the kids were in euphoric mode just to prove that I had this thing sewn up.

In a nutshell what is Fortnite for the unenlightened whom I can now look down on smugly…well the whole aim is to be the last person standing. Have you seen the hunger games? It’s pretty much that but on game version.

100 players, 1 battlebus, 1 map with the same town and location places on every jump, loads of ‘loot’ goodies such as guns, shields and traps to help you stay alive.

fortnite and the middle aged mum

The game matches up 100 people including yourself, you all set off in the battlebus and jump off over a point in the map you want to land, you then skydive out of the battlebus. Float down to your chosen place……along with 99 others who are just as eager to be the last one standing and let the fun begin. Oh just incase that wasn’t enough, there’s a storm circle closing in so that you can’t just find a bush and hide in it. This is great though as it makes each game around 20 minutes maximum which is just about enough. Considering that the youngsters with their dexterous digits normally eliminate me in about half that time, 20 minutes is something to aspire to.

Fortnite and the middle aged mum
One of the many costumes – ‘skins’ if you’re down with the kids

There’s lots of stats out there which show that around 125 million people have Fortnite accounts and it’s been reported that at any one time there can be over 3 million players online. Crazy numbers.

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fortnite and the middle aged mum

The thing is, I find that it’s really family friendly. Yes there’s guns and you fight to survive but it has ‘something’ that is engaging that makes us all sit together having a family competition for the best score and we have not done something like that in a long while. This game gets us together and for me that’s great. Will it last? Who knows, we’ve been through the Minecraft and Candy Crush fads and although you think it’s the best thing at the time fads fade and something new and shiny comes along.

fortnite and the middle aged mum
This is what you want to see at the end! Winner!

So why do I feel in the minority and think that men and boys appear to play more?

Do they ‘switch’ off better than women?

Do they have that ability to put aside the fact that the kids dentists appointments need to be booked or where did I put the letter from the insurance that came through yesterday. It sounds sexist but is it true nonetheless?

I would love to hear from any other mums, with your tales of the Fortnite effect, let’s hear if it’s your guilty pleasure too. In the words of the great Delia Smith on the terraces ‘Let’s be avin ya!’

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Keep Calm and Carry On Linking Sunday

Family festival in Hamworthy Park

The hot weather is continuing here and it’s taken me a bit by surprise, I really feel like we are having a summer, it’s brilliant! Just about every day we are all heading down to the beach for a swim which I love and the boys love even more. They are straight in and swimming before I can even get the towels out.

One of the beaches I used to go to when I was little was Hamworthy beach as I grew up around there and could walk to it quite easily with my family. Last weekend I was pleased to be invited by the bournemouth bloggers to a family festival held in hamworthy park and organised by Sorted in Dorset. This is an initiative set up by the people behind Party in the Park, a family-focused community festival which started in 2001 and over a 15 year period became the most popular event in Poole, Dorset.

Family festival

Hamworthy Park has limited parking next to it and the park and beach was full so it took a bit of time to find somewhere but we managed in the end. As it was so hot, everyone was out and about so it was to be expected. I dropped my OH and the boys off so that they could stretch their legs and play a bit of footie. Really, if I’m honest I’d rather park up without the ‘help’ of my nearest and dearest!

We arrived as the party was getting into full swing by the sounds of the music. There was a mixed bunch of musical talents through the day from Maddie Thorp to Luke Truth. Live music always makes you have a spring in your step. I would love to be far more musical than I am, it’s something I admire in others.

Family festival

There were lots of food and drink stall at the event. One of the stalls I wanted to go to was the Dorset Ginger company and I’d already tweeted them beforehand to say that I would be stopping by. I have a real thing for ginger drinks at the moment and I wanted to try a really good quality one. I had a taste of the original and then went all out for the strong one which for my palate was just right! This ginger drink can be enjoyed on its own or as a mixer. Alternatively it can be used in baking. Suits me brilliantly as I create alot of recipes for my blog and I know that I will incorporate it into a cake or cookies at some point. For the moment I’ll go with one of the recommendations of mixing it with lemonade and Pimms, delicious for the summer.

Family festival

Little one was hungry which is not surprising and he had enough places to choose from. He decided on a bacon buttie to keep away the hunger and he thoroughly enjoyed it. One of the good things was that there were hay bales around the place and we found some in the shade have our refreshment break.

Family festival

With a day like that we needed to keep drinking and refill dorset were raising awareness of their Reuse, Refill and Refresh campaign. Anywhere that you see the Refill logo you will be able to fill up your water bottles.

Family festival

All in all we made the most of what was on offer, there were rides for the little ones and football shooting practice for the slightly bigger ones. The food and music were a great bonus and the event had a nice relaxed family feel to it.

Unfortunately due to low attendance overall at the hamworthy event, the next one which was due to be held in Bournemouth in August has been cancelled. That’s such a shame but understandable that sometimes these decisions have to be made. Here’s to hoping the event organisers reschedule and we hear more from them soon. Good luck to them.

I’m off to create some new recipes like my carrot cake and chocolate brownies! Yum.

What have you been up to so far? Are you planning trips around Dorset this summer?

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Why I choose not to make money from my blog

My little blog is well over 2 years old and it’s amazing how far it’s come in that time and also how much it’s changed.

When I started my blog it all happened quite fast, it flowed and I was consumed with starting it up and learning all the new jargon. I had wanted something to channel a creative side that was stifled with the normality of having my job and family and just functioning.

What struck me quite early on was that so many people were talking about how to make money from your blog. At first it baffled me as I had no idea that writing about the random thoughts in my head would have any relationship with earning money, yet there it was, everyone was doing it. I started reading about ads that you insert into your sidebar or posts, you know the sort I’m sure. They advertise different products depending on your audience and sit there quite happily trying to blend in. I normally end up clicking on them by accident as I think they are part of what I’m reading. Clever really!

There are so many pins with amazing statements such as ‘how I make thousands per month’ or ‘make money now from your blog, let me show you how’, I even saw one recently that said how they were making $50,000 per month! Wow, are you kidding me, that’s incredible. So, you can imagine, I was pretty much sidelined by this and pound signs started flashing in my eyes, luring me in their direction. Now the daft thing is that the whole reason I started my blog was to have a hobby that would help with a bit of relaxation-not to earn money-yet there I found myself applying for affiliated links and google ads and all manner of ad companies hoping they would accept me. I’d check my emails frantically to see what news there would be of my requests. Most of them didn’t even reply as I hadn’t really published anything and had no value to them at all, well doh that was pretty easy to see had I taken the time to think about it. The thing is that I still really didn’t want my blog to look like it was advertising anything as I wanted it to represent me and the things that I like, I was still finding my feet with what I was creating. I didn’t want to be a follower, surely to work for google ads is to be a very small fish in a massive shoal. The blog is for me to stretch myself not to stand rigid and conform quite so much.

I remember posting my first piece and including the one advert I had managed to install, I then sat back and  expected people to suddenly flock to the blog clapping that I had appeared, read my stuff, click on the ads and general revel in the fact that I was here…..funnily enough, that didn’t happen.

I gradually came to realise that content is key to keep a blog going and to keep my interest in it. I left my little ad on that post and left it at that. I want people to read what I have to say and not get taken away by the ads and lose interest in me.  That said, I love reviewing products and I certainly wouldn’t turn my nose up at a lovely big commission to work with someone. I’m not against making money in general, after all it’s how I help keep a roof over my head.

I’m now having fun with my blog, I run giveaways which is great, talk about my family, write poetry and cook, it’s a wonderful outlet. For the time being the ads will not have a home here – not now, not yet, but maybe sometime.

What do you think of ads on blogs, do they make you stay, shop or click away?

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It’s the weekend….

Oh and the school holidays start!! Da da daaaaa!! It’s brilliant to have such a great start to the summer, with all this sun we have been down the beach most days after the boys have finished school. Living on the south coast of England is such a dream.

The World Cup kept us pretty occupied while it was on. Maybe football didn’t come home but I think the team did us proud! It was great to all get behind England and we loved it in our house. We had the lucky bunting up and had a great time watching so many matches. Being a mixed heritage household we had different teams to support but England were the most successful.

This weekend we are going to the Sorted in Dorset family festival in hamworthy Park which looks set to be a lot of fun. I remember going to that park when I was little as we had a beach hut there, so it’s going to be quite nostalgic too.

In the garden I’m going to have a good root around my plants. The success story there this week are my tomatoes.

It’s the weekend....

With all of this lovely hot sun they are growing beautifully. Another week or so and they should start to ripen up to a rich red!

Not as lucky are my purple brussel sprouts. The delicate but deadly cabbage white butterfly managed to lay their eggs and the caterpillars 🐛 had a feeding frenzy before I could pick them all off.

It’s the weekend....

That’s the thing with my version of organic gardening, I haven’t put anything other than water on the plants and deal with the bugs by picking them and putting them up the end of the garden. I still have my fingers crossed that my aim of have home grown brussel sprouts as part of my christmas dinner roast will actually happen.

All in all this weekend will be out in the fresh air as much as possible. A great start to the summer holidays.

What are your plans for the weekend or the summer break?

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More gardening stories can be seen here with my 5 steps to making a raised bed.

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